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July 29th, 2003

The Worst Commercials

There are two industries that consistently make the worst TV commercials. I’m not talking production values, though… in one case, I’m talking about creativity and in the other I’m talking about creativity and effectiveness.

Beer commercials are, to me at least, almost 100% lame. There have been a few trend-setters along the way, but are the testosterone-driven beer commercials of today any different than the testosterone-driven beer commercials of 20 years ago? Not really. I’m sure I’ll face a lot of resistance on this one, but I’m holding my ground.

Even worse than beer commercials, though, are car commercials. Pretty much every car commercial has three parts to it: 1. the car being advertised driving fast, 2. a focus on some sort of financing deal that has become so ubiquitous, it’s all but worthless (0% financing with 0 down!!! yahooooo!), and 3. the words “Professional driver on closed course. Do not attempt.” Seriously: when was the last time a car commercial you saw really changed your image of the car or made you think, “Hm, you know what would be good right now? A car, as an impulse buy!” Considering that almost every commercial break features at least one car commercial, it’s pretty sad that there’s only one company making ads that are the least bit interesting or innovative (Volkswagon).

Posted in Television, Movies, and Music

This is crazy! January 12, 2007, 3:00 pm

Evan Stoliar, car commercials should be required to show the REAL car, and ‘computer animation’ is an oxymoron.
Another crazy trend that ought to be outlawed is the absurd practice of product placement (which isn’t even limited to real products). The worst product placement ever is in a Powerpuff Girls episode called Jewel Of The Aisle, which is a story about a robber who gets away from the Powerpuff Girls but hadn’t counted on losing the Klopman Diamond in a Generally Foods Cereal factory (General Mills is the real, trademarked company, which they don’t mention on the show). He opens box after box of Lucky Captain Rabbit King Nuggets in search of his prize but to no avail, so he dresses up as Lucky Captain Rabbit King and goes after the box that got away. The girls tell the robber dressed as Lucky Captain Rabbit King “Ridiculous Lucky Captain Rabbit King, Lucky Captain Rabbit King Nuggets are for the youth!” (a BLATANT rip-off of “Silly rabbit, Trix are for KIDS!”) a mere 12934856132498757283916798134675 times in this episode before catching him with the Klopman Diamond in his mouth. (“Stupid unlucky captured robber dude, JAIL is for you!”) Jewel Of The Aisle is a de-facto ten-minute commercial for Lucky Captain Rabbit King Nuggets. Worst…Product…Placement…EVER!!!

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