The Daily Ping

The original Ping was painfully written in Perl.

August 5th, 2003

Book-A-Minute

You’ve got to love a site like Book-A-Minute, which provides you with ultra-condensed versions of books and movies. How condensed is “ultra-condensed”? Here’s Beowolf:

Hrothgar

Let’s build a big old dining hall and call it Herot.

(They do. Then Grendel, an ugly guy, takes over Herot and eats people.Beowulf rips his arm off.)

All

You rule, Beowulf.

(Some people make SPEECHES and tell IRRELEVANT STORIES. Beowulf kills somemore STUFF.)

Beowulf

Wiglaf, I’m dying. See that my funeral pyre fits my greatness.

Wiglaf

Ok.

THE END

My favorite movie reviews are for Wild Things and Speed. You’ve got to love anyone that can give the gist of a two-hour production in a few seconds.

I’m thinking that certain Pings could be condensed into this format. Anyone want to give it a shot?

(A nod to co-worker Yanek for this find.)

Posted in Television, Movies, and Music

FROM: Greg
DATE: Tuesday August 5, 2003 -- 11:19:29 am
Ryan

I have not had good experiences with towing companies but have heard some good stories

Chorus - (stage left)

Ryan, you suck, towing companies rule!

Chorus - (stage right)

Ryan, you're right, towing companies suck!

The End



FROM: Doren
DATE: Tuesday August 5, 2003 -- 2:00:56 pm
Condensed Daily Pings?

Here you go-

I see two versions.......

Version #1
RYAN/PAUL: (Blank) really sucks.
READERS: We know.

-or-

Version #2
RYAN/PAUL: Remember (Blank)?
READERS: Yes.


Brevity. It's a beautiful thing.



FROM: Ryan
DATE: Tuesday August 5, 2003 -- 2:40:48 pm
Wow, Doren -- in your first post, you've managed to capture the essence. Although in both versions, one more line should be added:

ONE-TIME READER: Can I have pictures for my school report?



FROM: Dave Walls [E-Mail]
DATE: Tuesday August 5, 2003 -- 10:06:24 pm
Dave Walls©, in co-operation with Chillow-Me-Out Productions©, presents "Freedom Fries:The Condensed Story"

Dave: "The Name 'Freedom Fries' is stupid.

Forienger: "This is another sign that America is a lesser nation!"

Rest of Ping: "WTF?"

FIN.



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