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August 16th, 2003

The Swim

My name is Paul, and I can’t swim.

It’s not that I haven’t been interested in learning to swim (although it hasn’t been at the top of my to-do list), it’s just that I never got around to it. I can’t swim and, as a bonus, I have a fear of drowning. Of course, said fear was created when I was in a friend’s swimming pool when I was a kid, and was knocked from behind, causing me to do a 360 in the water.

I might swim someday, but I just hope to never be in a situation where I need to swim – like, say, on a boat in the ocean. I figure I’ll play it safe and remain a landlubber.

Posted in Everyday Life

FROM: Matt
DATE: Saturday August 16, 2003 -- 12:07:10 am
Your parents should have taken you to a baby swim class when you were a toddler. Those bad boys teach you how to float and swim when you are a wee lad.

FROM: Kate
DATE: Saturday August 16, 2003 -- 1:28:27 am
There are also swimming classes for adults, if you're ever interested.

FROM: jk
DATE: Saturday August 16, 2003 -- 10:16:01 am
You can do it! You'll love it. There's such a feeling of freedom in the water, especially when no one is trying to drown you. Is there a Y near you? I am sure they have a class for you, and you will not be alone.

The plus-side is that you probably have a tendency to burn in the sun, so all those years out of the water have protected you from skin cancer.

FROM: Paul
DATE: Saturday August 16, 2003 -- 11:14:49 am
I'm Irish and have pale skin, so I'm practically a sunburn waiting to happen.

FROM: Robert [E-Mail]
DATE: Saturday August 16, 2003 -- 11:25:05 am
As soon as you learn to swim you can start wearing Speedos. See, there's another reason to learn.

FROM: Paul
DATE: Saturday August 16, 2003 -- 12:48:54 pm
That's more reason for me not to swim, Robert; I have a "Speedos Don't Need To Exist Outside Of Competitive Swimming" policy.

DATE: Wednesday January 5, 2005 -- 10:53:45 pm
It is like Imposible to not know how to swim, i mean you can not swim well, but your body mass is less than 1 so u will always float, unless u r like retarded. I think it is mainly that u r afraid to swim, so toughen up.

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