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March 8th, 2001

The Trouble with Network Solutions II

I continue to love Network Solutions. Last night I was sending some email to my friend Tony, and it was processed normally. Imagine my surprise when I got the mail bounced back to me with this in the header: does not exist

Aungh! I didn’t think too much of it, and put a message on my site saying that Network Solutions was funky. Then, the phone rang, and it was none other than Ryan. Yes, our first ever phone call was him telling me that my site was down, and the WHOIS entry claimed it expired in January.

This was all news to me, as I received not one email from Network Solutions at any time telling me that my domain was about to expire! Incredible. I immediately freaked and chose to renew my domain… and you know what? Not even 24 hours later, it was back up. Here are a few alternative slogans I’ve designed for Network Solutions:

Network Solutions: "We Succeed At Being Sucky" (sm)
Network Solutions: "Our service might suck, but when you’re giving us money, we’re 133T." (sm)
Network Solutions: "The Best Buy of Domain Registrars" (sm)
Network Solutions: "Oh, just give yourself a lobotomy instead." (sm)

Posted in Consumer Commentary

FROM: Robert
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 8:58:50AM
"The Best Buy of Domain Registrars"

Ah, so . . . did you buy the add-on warranty? That should remedy whatever's wrong once it spends three weeks in their Baltimore warehouse collecting dust.

FROM: Tony
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 3:40:08PM
Did you send it again, if so I never recived it.

FROM: Robert
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 4:43:20PM
BTW, what the fudge does "133T" mean?

FROM: Tony
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 8:38:40PM
Uh..leet, as in elite.

FROM: Tony
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 9:00:02PM
Nevermind Paul, found it.

FROM: Paul
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 10:30:03PM
Tony, you've got a near-monopoly on the comments today. Rock on!

FROM: Robert
DATE: Thursday March 8, 2001 -- 11:48:53PM
So "133T" is short for "elite". Damn, that is lame.

FROM: Tony
DATE: Friday March 9, 2001 -- 7:28:46AM
Thank you.

DATE: Saturday January 1, 2005 -- 3:11:35 pm

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