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April 4th, 2002

Dr. Leonard’s

Yesterday a wonderful mailing came into our home: Dr. Leonard’s, America’s Leading Discount Healthcare Catalog. On the front page was a cheap knockoff of Super Blue Stuff called Blue Relief. Also present was The Perfect Pancake, a pancake maker you might’ve seen on TV – what that has to do with healthcare, I just don’t know.

But it got worse. Not only do they sell a video called How to Make Sex Fun, Volume 3, oh no. They have a swell American Flag Pin and, of course, VIGEL – “enhance female arousal”. Unfortunately, the Dr.’s online catalog didn’t have VIGEL listed. Sorry, ladies. For the men? Not only are there nude yoga videos (“because you can see the muscular lines on… nude bodies, you can… achieve the perfect muscle extension”), but there’s also something called ReJoyn, and it is damned scary.

The good doctor obviously has a broad definition of “healthcare”, and the fact that every order comes with a free gift is very, very scary. -pm

Posted in Just Plain Odd

FROM: Matt
DATE: Thursday April 4, 2002 -- 12:48:52 am
Isn't sex fun as is?



FROM: Robert [E-Mail]
DATE: Thursday April 4, 2002 -- 1:42:51 am
Not when you do it through a hole in a sheet.



FROM: Patrick
DATE: Thursday April 4, 2002 -- 10:05:19 am
Robert, that depends on whats on the other side of the sheet.



FROM: Matt
DATE: Thursday April 4, 2002 -- 3:10:43 pm
Robert-
I was thinking more of a teddy-bear with a hole cut into it.



FROM: Elizabeth
DATE: Thursday April 4, 2002 -- 4:15:05 pm
All I can say is YUCK. Nude yoga? just wear some spandex, and you can see plenty of muscles.

Also, Leonard(o) must be one busy turtle because he also runs Leonard's Mailing Co right by my apt in Fort Collins.



FROM: Harry
DATE: Saturday July 27, 2002 -- 2:05:24 am
Nothing could make Yoga interesting. Not even nudity.



FROM: sammie thompson
DATE: Sunday August 4, 2002 -- 3:42:08 pm

why don"t you send my product or send my money so I can order from some one else!!!!! sammie thompson ***address deleted***......



FROM: Ryan
DATE: Monday August 5, 2002 -- 9:14:05 am
Take note that this is the second time that Sammie has posted his/her home address to the Ping thinking that we were Dr. Leonard's. The first time we deleted his message figuring it was an accident. The second time we leave it up (minus his home address) in order to make fun of him.



FROM: Mike [E-Mail]
DATE: Monday August 5, 2002 -- 10:43:11 am
Sammie - let us know what you've ordered so we can process your refund.

We'll still send you the free gift as a thank you for your business. You wanted the Breast Form, correct? Now was it the Ebony Without Nipple or the Beige Without Nipple?

-Mike
Customer Service Representative



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