The Daily Ping

The 1st Ping was published on January 6, 2000.

January 3rd, 2004

Name Butchering

Around our house, when someone calls and butchers my wife’s first name, we know it’s likely a telemarketer. Or when they ask for “Michael,” thinking that part of our last name is actually my first name. This morning we got a call from an insurance agent (not ours) that butchered my wife’s name really badly. In their records they had “Michael” as the first name and a concatenation of her first and middle names (neither of which are standard American names) as her last name.

Has your name ever been terribly butchered?

Posted in Everyday Life

FROM: Chris [E-Mail]
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 10:01:09 am
I frequently get three copies of the same American Express junk mail, delivered on the same day, to 3 different spellings of my last name.

I also get a lot of junk mail to much for the Domain database not being used for commercial purposes.

FROM: Dave Walls [E-Mail]
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 10:52:49 am
Oh yeah.

When I had to sign for the "customer card" at a supermarket in Virginia to get the savings, I noticed that they didn't check ID, but all fields on the form had to be filled. Somewhere in Virginia, some poor soul with the number 867-5309 is getting calls for someone named Calvin Broadeus.

For-shizzle my nizzle, Food Lion.

FROM: Rob Wiltbank
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 10:54:09 am
Wallbanger, Wolfgang, Wiltbang... along with about 4 or 5 other variants. Dunno what's so hard about a two sylable name that, individually, create two perfectly normal words.

FROM: Paul
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 11:48:17 am
My last name always gets butchered. And no one is sure how to spell my wife's first name (there are so many variants.)

By far, my favorite was when I got mailings for "Apul."

FROM: Dave Walls [E-Mail]
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 12:45:20 pm
Rob --

You know I butchered your name for at least the first month or so after I met you, Rob Wilbanks. ;p

FROM: Robert [E-Mail]
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 12:57:55 pm
My last name, an Americanization of a Polish name, has an "e" at the end that should be spoken. Up until I was about 16 every single person who spoke it who didn't know me assumed it was silent. I don't know what got the world to suddenly find the inspiration not to make that mistake any more.

Oh, but folks still pronounce the first syllable, "so," like its "zuh." I hate that!

FROM: jk
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 5:09:22 pm
I wouldn't know where to start. My name is also an Americanization of a European name, yet people ADD letters that are not even there! Especially the people with ADT. They add an m and a t.

The folks at Costco misread my handwriting and had the first syllable as "Krap" on a recent cake order.

FROM: Monica
DATE: Saturday January 3, 2004 -- 10:57:57 pm
Nick got a sale notice from JC Penney's, addressed to "Turkish Kitchen or current resident".

FROM: Rob [E-Mail]
DATE: Monday January 5, 2004 -- 11:13:34 am
The Washington Post insists my last name is Carven and they refuse to believe otherwise.

When I sent flowers to Sarah one time (online, so it was actually typed out), the little card said it was from Bob. Which I never ever go by.

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