The Daily Ping

The 5,000th Ping will be published on September 14, 2013.

July 14th, 2004

Too Much Perfume

Yesterday as I was exiting the elevator, I was assaulted.

It wasn’t a person or a doorman or a thug or a Rockies fan, no; it was perfume.

The building I work in has three elevators (it’s pretty tiny.) I was in the elevator farthest from the exit, so I needed to walk by two other elevator doors. Both were closed, but the second door had an incredibly strong perfume smell about it. It was sweet and alcohol-y, like a perfume one would probably buy at Wal-Mart.

It’s possible and perhaps even likely that I had just missed someone go into that elevator all perfumed up. But for goodness sake, what kind of social or professional situation requires that much perfume? (It’s arguable that there isn’t any situation that requires perfume at all, but that’s another Ping.) Do these people not know that they’re stinking up the entire place? Or are they just accepting of it?

Here’s an idea: National No Perfume or Cologne Day. And you know when it’s going to be held? That’s right. Every day.

Posted in Everyday Life

FROM: jk
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 12:32:09 am
A scent should not reach a room before you do, and it should not linger in the room after you leave. Thank me.

In college, a woman who lived three doors away in my residence hall wore Poison and the odor filled the whole floor. It was awful and made me want to throw up. Don't even get me started about sorority rush!

I don't buy perfume; I wear serious, scented lotions. One is Italian vanilla and my next purchase will be fig leaf lotion. Nice and earthy, not sweet or cheap-smelling. I don't think people can really smell it but it makes me happy.

FROM: MollyCule
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 1:09:47 am
I was wearing Canned Peaches scented perfume from Smell This a few months ago in an elevator, and three seperate people commented that the elevator smelled like pies baking.

FROM: Chris [E-Mail]
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 8:23:15 am
I love the smell of Poison. But genreally speaking I agree - I hate perfume that lingers in the room long after the werer has left.

FROM: jk
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 12:01:44 pm
How about Patchouli? I cannot stand how that lingers! And if you touch something that they touched, it's on you! Sometimes I come across money that reeks of patchouli. I truly don't know how anyone could think it smells good. It reminds me of garbage.

FROM: Ryan [E-Mail]
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 12:09:26 pm
I actually don't mind the smell of patchouli. It has that nice "hippie smell" (not the haven't-bathed-hippie smell, but the incense-like hippie smell).

FROM: Rafael
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 12:42:51 pm
The ULTIMATE worst is on a crowded bus first thing in the morning and you can not open a window because it is in the middle of winter and is freezing outside. You just have to breathe with your mouth.

Don’t get me wrong I do like nice scents but for Christ sake DON’T bathe in the stuff! Guess some people don’t know the meaning of moderation or sparingly ;)

FROM: Grim Riper
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 4:03:19 pm
Sure, everyone thinks perfume is okay, but God help you if you smoke a cigarette anywhere! Maybe it's time we banned perfume just like smoking in all public places. I can't stand it when people walk around and stink like SH*T (they think they smell good!) I'd PAY THEM TO SMOKE A DOOBIE or NOT WEAR ANY OF THAT SH*T altogether!!1

FROM: Ryan [E-Mail]
DATE: Wednesday July 14, 2004 -- 5:32:23 pm
I bet the "Grim Riper" smells "riper."

FROM: Joseph
DATE: Thursday July 15, 2004 -- 1:59:23 pm
Had breakfast at the diner on Saturday. All was going well until this greasy type sat down next to us with the fuzz (which nestled a gold corn on a chain) creeping out of the top of his shirt. You can turn your back if you can't stand to look at the pompadour, but the gallon of Polo ruined breakfast. I couldn't even smell my food anymore. All I could taste was Polo. Why do these people exist? Have they no noses? What's the use of so much odor? Whom does that obnoxiousness attract? It must attract some sort of female, because there is no shortage of Polo bathers, thus reproduction must occur.

FROM: Joseph
DATE: Thursday July 15, 2004 -- 2:07:28 pm
I also remember that my college room mate in the freshman dorm's father was some sort of muckety muck at Ralph Lauren. I'm giving away my age, but this was when Drakkar Noire was new. This kid had every DN product known to man, and felt obliged to use it. (You know he was from New Jersey!!--Scotch Plains, to be exact). This kid had it all: Drakkar soap, shower gel, talcum powder, hair gel, soap on a rope, shampoo, conditioner, cologne, spray, aftershave, shaving cream and more. He even had these little Drakkar wipes--they were like those Hand-wipes--it was a little foil condom-like package that contained a napkin soaked in Drakkar--so you could touch up, I guess.

Then he wondered why he never could get a date. No one else wondered. The worst was, because I lived in the room as well, I think a lot of people thought I was a 'fumer as well. That smell got everywhere.

The smell of Drakkar still makes me want to puke.

FROM: Rafael
DATE: Thursday July 15, 2004 -- 6:15:11 pm
Joseph, I’m with you there are a few cologne that to this day make me want to puke, those are Polo, Aramis, Eternity, Drakkar, Bijon and Laggerfelt. I’m sure you can imagine what type of guys used these colognes…thank god they don’t make most of them.

FROM: jk
DATE: Thursday July 15, 2004 -- 8:22:44 pm
It's funny to read all this and see just how differently wired we all are. I have never known any woman to like Polo, but I personally liked Drakkar in college. I dated one guy for a long time who wore it, but he only used the cologne, nothing else, to the best of my knowledge. It was not overwhelming, but complimented his whole image. (Think "John Stamos")

Remember Giorgio? That was certainly a status item in 1985.

FROM: Ryan [E-Mail]
DATE: Thursday July 15, 2004 -- 10:42:56 pm
This gives me the perfect opportunity to start a Ping rumor:

jk dated John Stamos!

FROM: Kate
DATE: Friday July 16, 2004 -- 12:57:03 am
I've also had the 'fumey roomie problem. I literally got sick to my stomach for the first two weeks of school, just because the smell was so strong. Fortunately, most of the smell stayed in the bedroom and did not follow me out. I am not a fan of "girl spray."

My pet peeve, though, is these new perfumes that smell like food (usually fruit). It makes me hungry. If I smell country apples, I want an apple, darnit, I don't want to see some girl with a spray bottle. Anything that smells like food but isn't should be banned. (Apologies to anyone that wears that stuff.)

FROM: Joseph
DATE: Friday July 16, 2004 -- 1:51:33 pm
Kate: Inducing another human to take a bite somewhere might be the idea ; ). I suppose it depends upon where you spray.

jk: It wasn't really the particular odor or scent of Drakkar that offended me. It was the sheer overwhelming volume. The effect was to cause a nauseous reaction. Many people express similar reactions to certain particular boozes they overdid it with at some point early in their drinking careers--like the ever popular Boone's.

I was never given the chance to develop an objective opinion of the smell of Drakkar; it was ruined with me from the first.

The smell of Polo doesn't really offend me, when it isn't overwhelming. The problem is, most guys who wear Polo way overdo it. There's something about that stuff that makes those who wear it want to bathe in it. Perhaps its because it does smell good. I don't know.

I don't wear cologne, perfume or eau d' toilette. Sometimes, when I want to wear something like that, I just go for the true original: pure frankincense oil. Why? Well because most expensive perfumes contain it as a starting point, and then they try to improve on it. When they do, they just make it smell a bit different, and, in my opinion, less good. You can't add to pure frankincense and you can't make it better. Less is more and more is less.
It smells so good, people have gone to war and died for it for eons. It's trade has been highly regulated since ancient times. At some points in history, it was more highly valued than gold. The best part, it only takes one drop or two and it lasts forever. A tiny amount literally will last you the rest of your life.

It's not so expensive anymore, and ounce for ounce, it's way cheaper than anything on the market since you have to use so little. Also, it doesn't evaporate or go flat like commercial fragrances, which you should replace yearly.

There are a few varieties based on the species of the frankincense tree it is derived from. Everyone loves it, as far as I can tell, and when I wear it, people (those who get near enough, that is--NOT people from across the room, or even in the next seat at the diner, if you know what I mean) always ask me what it is, and accuse me of having designer cologne on.

FROM: jk
DATE: Friday July 16, 2004 -- 9:27:58 pm
My secret's out....oh no, here come the Mary Kate and Ashley fan posts!

FROM: John Stamos
DATE: Friday July 23, 2004 -- 3:00:01 pm

Why haven't you called since Becky and I have split? I've been waiting so long. And now I find you here, hanging out with these punks.

How low have you sunk since I last gazed into your eyes?

Call me, babe. We'll hook up.


FROM: mel
DATE: Wednesday August 11, 2004 -- 1:02:56 pm
I just like the creation of new words to add to my vocabulary. "'Fumer" will be a much welcome addition.

FROM: Louise
DATE: Wednesday August 25, 2004 -- 11:21:55 am
I am a perfume lover and i think the majority of people like myself who re apply, are not doing it out of spite but, its a well known fact that the person wearing the fragrance usaully loose the smell approx one hour later, and then they re apply as they may think that they are perfumeless however, i have learnt that even if i can not smell it, others can, but i agree its not nice when its overpowering, also there are a few people, who would love the world to be bathed in their favourite smell and it just simply isn't going to happen!!!

FROM: Eric
DATE: Friday February 4, 2005 -- 4:32:23 pm
I think everyone should wear perfume, but only so much that you smell it when close. It should be like a nice aura that stays a few feet around the person. Too many people wear too much so it more resembles a nukelear blast where miles surrounding the actualy blast-zone is showered in radiation

FROM: Adam
DATE: Friday February 4, 2005 -- 5:15:10 pm
It never ceases to amaze me... The scent of every gay bar I have ever been to is absolutely incredible, like every designer fragrance known to man in a cosmic battle for supremecy!

FROM: Jonathan
DATE: Saturday June 18, 2005 -- 4:47:25 pm
I think perfume or cologne should be something intimate that can only be detected by those whom are very close to you, hence the 'romantic' associations with it. Anyone who stinks the entire room out as soon as they enter are wearing way too much and are defeating the whole object of wearing cologne in the first place.

The idea is to attract others to you, not knock them for six. You will only repel and choke others with a heavy application. So, easy does it guys and gals, just use two sprays at the most and only re-apply after 4-5 hours have passed and the scent has worn off. Pick a light, fresh fragrance for work or to wear during the day. Anything musky, oriental or overtly sensual is too strong for daywear and will give quite the wrong message to your colleagues at the workplace!

My favourite scents are CK One, Diesel and Hugo Boss. More often than not, I simply shower with clean, fresh soap and go without wearing any cologne. The soapy smell lingers on my skin and smells really clean and sexy and I get compliments for it sometimes!!! That, I think, is the key here; SUBTLETY. Too much perfume on a woman or man is incredibly vulgar and distasteful, I aim this comment at both sexes but particularly men who often douse themselves in aftershave and eau de toilette and think they smell great because of it.

Although I like cologne as a general rule, I could certainly live without it. This idea that wearing it confers sex appeal or attractiveness is just TOTAL BULLSHIT. It is simply a marketing ploy by cosmetics companies to get you to buy their expensive products. If a woman is ugly, no amount of perfume or bodyspray is going to make her into Julia Roberts. If you are attractive, a light spray of perfume will add to this effect. If you are average or ugly, a spray of perfume will make you a sweet-smelling ugly/average person.

None of this crap works miracles, the same goes for make-up, I might add.
Experiment with different fragrances and have fun, but don't get obsessed. You don't need to own or try every perfume on the market, and you don't need to smell as if you bathe in it either. I know a lot of guys who never, ever wear cologne or aftershave but they still smell great. Just clean and shower-fresh is sometimes better than applied chemicals for attracting the opposite sex.

Aim to own 2-3 fragrances for different occasions and moods. Any more than this is quite unnecessary and also expensive, you will get depressed and stressed if you try to sample every scent or own every cologne on the market. You will also give yourself a nasty headache!

FROM: Rebecca
DATE: Saturday June 18, 2005 -- 5:23:20 pm
You know, men have a natural musky smell that is just so gorgeous, but then they spoil it by spraying on tons of Lynx and then marinating themselves in Old Spice or Brut (incidentally, I would not even use Brut to freshen my toilet, it's sooo strong!).

I think that a man's natural scent is so seductive, and I'm not talking about unwashed smell or BO. Just sexy musky with a hint of soap, that's my idea of gorgeous.

Have you ever walked into a male locker room by mistake (or deliberately!) and you can just smell the testosterone in the air? That's the smell I'm talking about. Freshly showered, clean male without aftershave or cologne. There is nothing that Calvin Klein can produce to compete with this..........................................

FROM: Deborah
DATE: Thursday June 23, 2005 -- 3:45:57 pm
I never wear perfume because it's expensive, it's also bad for your health. Up to 60% of what you put on your skin is absorbed into the bloodstream (this is how Nicotine and HRT patches work) through the skin. Perfumes and colognes contain hundreds of synthetic chemical ingredients and many of these are harmful or carcinogenic. When they get absorbed through the skin and into your bloodstream minutes after being applied, they build up in organs and skin tissues causing permanent damage and risking your health.

The worst of these chemicals are synthetic musk components, pthalate esters and formaldehyde. The alcohol that is also heavily used in commercial perfumes dries the skin out badly and sensitises it to the chemicals in the perfume, wearing down the skin's barrier function and irritating it. Which enables the ingredients to penetrate even further and makes the skin even more vulnerable to them.

If you continually apply and expose yourself to these toxic chemicals, you may find yourself developing an alllergy to the powerful scent chemicals, or even developing a severe and life-threatening disease called MCS (Multiple Chemical Sensitivity) which you can look up on the net if you want more information about it.

Stop blasting yourself and others with these stinking, toxic chemicals. You don't need to buy and wear poison to get clean and smell great. Just try an unscented soap in the shower every morning and a light mist of unscented anti-perspirant afterwards to keep you dry and fresh. Don't give people allergies and wheezing by wearing strong chemicals, don't waste your cash on toxic trash. Being clean yet odourless is an important part of social politeness. It is a conscious and considerate choice to NOT invade the personal space of others and offend their nostrils with your scent. You may find a fragrance subtle or romantic, but for a person sensitive to fragrances it could be agonisingly strong and pungent, causing discomfort, dizziness, wheezing, asthma symptoms, headaches, migraines, sneezing, or skin sensitivity and rashes.

Whatever you do, do not spray your perfume about in public places like offices and buses or toilets, or spray somebody else with your scent of choice. I go mad when I walk into department stores and assistants spritz me automatically with Jean-Paul Gaultier when I am halfway through the door, it makes me cough and choke and gives me a headache and streaming eyes for weeks.

Perfumes have made my life torture, absolute torture...........................

FROM: Bridget
DATE: Thursday June 30, 2005 -- 4:49:42 pm
I have to agree with you about perfumes being overpowering and women drowning themselves in it. I have always been a sporty, athletic type of girl and I was always teased at school by the other girls for not 'conforming' to what was expected of me. I never wore make-up or perfume, and they were always saying that I would never get a boyfriend being the way I was.

I was frequently referred to as a tomboy behind my back, a couple of times I even heard the word 'dyke'. Actually, I never went short of boyfriends and a lot of boys liked the fact that I did not spend hours getting myself ready in the mirror or wearing make-up and 'smelly stuff' as they used to call the perfumes that girls at school inevitably overused. I can always remember the girls spraying on way too much scent, then re-applying it an hour later thinking that they smelt great. They stank so badly that I often had to hold my hand over my nose.

Anyway, I am off to play tennis now. Just thought I would give my contribution to this debate. No, I don't wear stinky chemicals, I don't have the time or inclination to bother with that sort of thing. I think most guys prefer to smell our natural womanly scent; Eau De You.

FROM: Charlotte
DATE: Sunday July 10, 2005 -- 3:15:21 pm
I've never really bothered with the cologne thing. I do think that some perfumes smell nice, but I have not been tempted to wear them myself. Perfumes can be quite expensive and that's the quality ones, the cheap colognes always smell like c***. I'm not sure why really, but I never got into the whole perfume thing and I never, ever think of this stuff as an essential product in terms of dating. I'm sure that a lot of guys don't like the stuff anyhow, my brothers always complained about girls at college ponging from all the sprays they used.

I do agree with the poster who said that clean and shower-fresh was the way to go. I have to say that I always feel very sexy straight after a shower when my skin is zinging and fresh and I can just barely detect the soapy aroma on my body.


FROM: Joseph
DATE: Monday July 11, 2005 -- 12:20:06 pm

That's a new one.

-ock? -unt? -lit? -ork? -amp? -aca?

You can only self-censor like that if everyone knows what you mean.

FROM: snaily
DATE: Monday July 11, 2005 -- 10:55:46 pm
i hate perfume. most of it doesnt even smell good. im also allergic to some of it.

joseph- i agree. anyway, if you have to self censor yourself (i think think that was a double negative) then why use the word in the first place if it offends you or others????

DATE: Wednesday July 13, 2005 -- 2:45:04 pm
I don't wear perfume, along with make-up, bras and stiletto shoes.
Partly because I'm a non-conformist radical feminist and also because I hate them. This shit is all designed to appeal to men and make them like you. Don't waste your time girls.

Men have never been worth it, they are certainly not worth the $25 that you spend on all this chemical crap in the department store. If you want to smell nice, then have a bath for Christ sakes. If you want to look nice then don't ever cake your face with make-up. Just scrub with soap and use a bit of Vaseline on your lips, you'll save money and your skin will look better for it.

As for bras and heels, just forget about it. Expensive torture devices that add nothing to your attractiveness. What, after all, is sexy about foot problems, blisters and nipple rash?

Just some thoughts

FROM: snaily
DATE: Wednesday July 13, 2005 -- 6:33:47 pm
hag- i love your philosophy:-)

FROM: Love Hag
DATE: Tuesday August 23, 2005 -- 9:08:15 am
Preach it hag! My kind of woman

FROM: Joseph
DATE: Tuesday August 23, 2005 -- 1:10:26 pm
This shit is all designed to appeal to men and make them like you. Don't waste your time girls. Men have never been worth it.

I agree with Hag's message, but not with the sexually-biased negative charge which places sole blame for women's expensive and unwelcome discomfort on men, when the real culprit is often simple female vanity and narcissism.

What, after all, is sexy about foot problems, blisters and nipple rash?

Absolutely!! Right on, Hag!!

DATE: Thursday November 24, 2005 -- 4:53:05 pm
Listen up punk, do you think that most sane women WANT to get up at 5 o'clock in the morning and go through all of this groomin torture just to please themselves? Just to make themselves happy? Bullshit boy, that's what vibrators were invented for. They do it for the guys, pal.

They buy all that orange panstick shit, slimy lipstick and stinking cologne to make your cocks swell, for your information. Why do you think women are vain in the first place? Because they are trying to get and keep their man.
Because they KNOW that most of you men can't keep your yank in your pants for five seconds and unless they look decent, you are going to run off and screw the next thing that comes along in a skirt.

Men are crap, your penises are crap, and all that primping shit that the girls do for your benefit, is crap. CRAP!

FROM: no one special
DATE: Monday November 28, 2005 -- 6:35:15 am
I gotta agree with Joseph here - a lot of what HAG has to say is true, but it can't all be placed on men. I know plenty of gay women who wear makeup and perfume every day because they want to look pretty, and wear bras because they don't want their boobs to sag (their words, not mine). Personally, I prefer the athletic type of girl, an unpretentious type who doesn't feel like she has to change the way she looks to be accepted. If she wants to dress up for a special reason, fine, but I think daily makeup is a waste of time and completely unnecessary, not to mention unsafe.

FROM: Callum
DATE: Monday November 28, 2005 -- 6:11:59 pm
I've heard that David Beckham's new fragrance 'INSTINCT' has been released onto the market (might take slightly longer for you Americans to get hold of some). I feel terrible because the other day, I overheard my girlfriend saying to a friend of hers that she was planning to buy me a bottle of Instinct as a Christmas present. The thing that bothers me is that I can't stand the stuff. I've never tried Instinct so it's not for me to diss it, but I am just not a big 'cologne-person'. I REALLY hate it when friends and family buy me smellies for Christmas like aftershave or eau de toilette. I just hate wearing it, it stinks and it makes me sneeze and also, some of that cheap aftershave gives me a rash. I just don't understand why guys like wearing it or can be flattered by having been bought it. I know it's the thought that counts and everything, but what are your friends and family trying to say by buying you some? That you smell?

I'm now dreading Christmas day, when my girlfriend proudly presents me with David Beckham Instinct gift-wrapped specially for me, I am going to have to smile and say thank you and pretend to be pleased. When really I want to throw it into the nearest garbage can.....................................
I'm interested in knowing what you guys out there think. Could I have some advice please? Do you think I am being ungrateful? I just hate colognes and I hate wearing them, I also think it's slightly effeminate to wear girly shit like that. I'm a man's man, you know, soap and water and Gillette razors? That kind of guy. Not aftershave and a Hermes silk scarf sort.

What should I do. It seems definite that this stuff is going to be bought for me at Christmas, I've only just managed to use up last year's bottle of Brut aftershave that I got for Xmas.

FROM: Joseph
DATE: Monday November 28, 2005 -- 11:34:22 pm

They buy all that orange panstick shit, slimy lipstick and stinking cologne to make your cocks swell, for your information.

Speaking for myself entirely, my cock has never swelled due to any of those named items. Perhaps you were just with the wrong men. Any man who needs all of that stuff to get wood is probably gay. Contact me off list. I'll set you "straight" so to speak. I'll know you by the petroleum jelly in your purse, and on your lips.

Because they KNOW that most of you men can't keep your yank in your pants for five seconds and unless they look decent, you are going to run off and screw the next thing that comes along in a skirt.

Then how come the office slut is always some fat chick? Answer: she can suck the chrome off of a trailer hitch, especially with that Vaseline gasket.

Why do you think women are vain in the first place? Because they are trying to get and keep their man.

For sure--and the fact that you have to have at least one boyfriend in order to start flattering your own egos by cheating, like the capricious little fellatrixes you are. I mean, what's the fun in giving one man your heart, when there are so many out there to love, at the same time even--particularly ones with fat, eh, wallets.

Listen up punk, do you think that most sane women WANT to get up at 5 o'clock in the morning and go through all of this groomin torture just to please themselves? Just to make themselves happy? Bullshit boy, that's what vibrators were invented for. They do it for the guys, pal.

So you think the average woman would rather get up at 5am and dong herself than groom? Hey, I'm fine with that. I'd get up at 5am too just to watch! In fact, I thought vibrators were invented so that men could watch women dong themselves. Besides, there's a lot less work involved that the alternative. I mean, it saves the man the hassle and cruelty of finding a horse and going through that whole mess.

Men are crap, your penises are crap, and all that primping shit that the girls do for your benefit, is crap. CRAP!

At least we can agree on some things. Of course, a vagina ain't no bed of roses either, and think of what men have to go through to keep a woman. Vaginas often smell, even when clean. Nevertheless, a man has to be great at cunnilingus. But, to indulge a double standard, a woman need only be so-so at fellatio--and bad fellatio is no grounds for a selfish man to break up with a woman, as far as women are concerned. A man who complains for lack of that sort of attention is a PIG. But, boy, if you don't kiss the cat, the dog plays alone. You gotta kiss that cat, no matter how bad the cat's breath stinks of fish. But don't expect any favors in return, she'll insult you by saying "all men want is sex!"

And, to remain on topic, penises may be crap, but they don't stink so bad that the powers that be invented special deodorant for them as they have for smelly vaginas.

And by the way, once you're married, fellatio is over. Maybe that's the real reason the fat office slut is always so popular. Quit groomin' and git blowin'!

So there you have it, Hag. Less primping, more fellatio! More marriages would last longer, for sure, and that woud be without even getting to the spit/swallow/in the mouth at all question--most men would be overjoyed if things just got that far. As for the office slut, she'd become less and less appealing, have to lose weight, and find her own man.

Now that this Ping has gone beyond all decency, I'll just pull out now and see if I've made a mess. I apologize for any bad taste I may have left in anyone's mouth.

FROM: Rabia
DATE: Thursday December 1, 2005 -- 12:45:57 pm
Dear Callum,

I can sympathise with what you are going through. One Christmas my boyfriend bought me a bottle of perfume as a gift. I can't to this day remember what it was called, but it was totally vile stuff. It smelt so terrible that my mother forbade me to ever wear it again. I smelt like a cheap tart wearing that perfume.

In your particular case, I think the best option is honesty. Tell your well-meaning girlfriend that you would like a jumper for Christmas or a book or a sunbed-anything OTHER than cologne. Also tell her that you don't like aftershaves and eau de toilettes because they make you feel ill wearing them (this, by the way, is a very common reaction to fragrances for a lot of people) . Don't tell her that you overheard her conversation, just say something along the lines of "Oh Honey, if you are wanting to get me a Christmas present this year, I'd really love a warm, woolly jumper!"

It does not have to be as camp as that, but let her know that you REALLY want something else for Christmas and emphasise the fact that you don't like colognes and aftershaves as presents as these are allergic items.

Good luck, Callum.

FROM: Madeleine
DATE: Sunday December 4, 2005 -- 1:22:27 pm
I don't wear perfume either. I prefer to just use scented soaps and shower gels to keep myself clean and fresh-smelling. Whenever I come into contact with people wearing perfumes, I can't detect a fragrance there, all I can smell is all the chemicals that go into making the product.

If people really have to wear scent, instead of strong perfumes why don't you try using a scented body lotion instead? Often, I have found that a lot of the fragrances used in these products lasts longer than eau de toilette and is also more subtle. It simply leaves a delicious, fragrant aura around the person wearing it, the scent is only detectable by those close enough to kiss you, and it is not overpowering or offensive to others. If you use matching soap, shower gel and shampoo with your favourite fragrance and then follow with the body lotion, you will find yourself enveloped in scent all day and smelling great.

Another reason for not wearing commercial perfumes is that these often contain high amounts of alcohol which dries the skin badly and ages it prematurely, also the chemicals used in perfumes can give people allergies and headaches. Best to skip the perfume altogether.

FROM: Boob
DATE: Monday March 20, 2006 -- 12:45:49 pm
I agree with Hag in philosophy, but I wear bras because my chest is ginormous and not wearing them hurts, especially when one is an athlete. (I tried going without for a few months in college -- never doing that again unless they shrink.)

Karl May 28, 2010, 6:03 am

I sometimes wear a cologne, before heading out but I make a spray and walk into it. That is it. I usually wear something light such as 212 from Carolina Herrera and not much. As far as baithing, I use a liquid soap from Dr. Bronner’s such as the baby formula. It has no scent and it is easy on the skin.

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