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February 22nd, 2007

Carlos Santana, Restauranteur

I’m kind of weirded out by the news that Carlos Santana is opening up a restaurant. From ye article:

The newest addition to the roster of celebrity-inspired restaurants, Carlos Santana’s Maria Maria, promises to deliver authentic Mexican cuisine in an atmosphere inspired by his music.

What kind of stuff could one expect at Maria Maria – other than the requirement that all employees be named Maria or Carlos? One only needs to thumb through Santana’s impressive discography to find out.

For instance, Marathon provides a few drink names: “Lightning in the Sky”. “Hard Times”. Undoubtedly one of the paint colors will be “Aqua Marine”. The reissue of his first album brings us “Fried Neckbones” (yum!) The menu will have to work in the title “Promise of a Fisherman” somehow. Might I suggest, “These fish sticks will fulfill the promise of a fisherman!”

But Santana might have to try a little harder. He could welcome everyone and offer A-1 Funk sauce on their steaks. That’d be smooth and would make somebody happy. At least there would be an open invitation.

Then there’s the music. Clearly Maria Maria will feature music from Wham!, which is a bold move.

I hope the place has nice restrooms.

Posted in Food and Beverage

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